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  #1  
Old 19-06-06, 01:38 PM
erudite
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Default Second attempt…

Hallo!

My second attempt at a portrait in tempera… To my eyes at least an improvement on my first one posted here: http://www.eggtempera.com/newforum/viewtopic.php?t=539

All comments are appreciated and taken on board :grin: The size is again 15cm X 24cm.



Bye for now,

Anton
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  #2  
Old 19-06-06, 04:09 PM
alexgarcia
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Anton,

I enjoyed looking at this second work. The softness and the color usage reminds me of George Tooker.

As far as a critique I would offer that the hairline appears a little hard on the right side of the painting which makes it appear more flat than the left side.

Overall I like this second attempt and your first as well.

I hope that is helpful.
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Old 19-06-06, 04:42 PM
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RobM RobM is offline
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I tend to agree Alex. The overall effect is of a sensitive person. I think it would work better if treated like the right shoulder. (The persons actual left shoulder!!)
Anton you are obviously an accomplished painter, why not join the UK band of eggie temp painters, we are all part of the same organisation.
If you are interested drop me an e-mail and I'll send you details.
Rob
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Old 19-06-06, 05:43 PM
Alessandra Kelley Alessandra Kelley is offline
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But that's the shape of the head, not the hairline. It seems clear to me that he has a high forehead, and you see it clearly in the light.

I like it very much. As for critiquing, you might want to think a bit about the pattern of light and shade around the nostrils. Without making it look like lines, it is still possible to get a sharp edge of shadow.
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Old 19-06-06, 06:01 PM
alexgarcia
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Alessandra,

You're right. After looking at it and considering the angle of the head that makes sense.

Alex
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Old 20-06-06, 02:12 AM
David McKay David McKay is offline
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I think that this is a wonderful portrait and although I do very little portrait work, I have, for what it is worth a suggestion. To me the subjects right side, (his cheek and eye), seems to come forward more than his left side. I would tone down slightly the highlight on his right cheek, right nostril and right eyelids. I like the mystery of having his right side in shadow while the left side of his face is in strong light. I really like the colours and textures. David
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  #7  
Old 20-06-06, 09:05 AM
erudite
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Thank you for all the comments. It is heartening to get some encouragement. I can never quite quiet down that "inner editor" that is always insisting it is not "up to scratch"!

Right now am busy gessoing a few larger panels — at least with this dry weather the drying times have been pretty quick.

Hope to have something new to show in a few weeks time. :grin:

Thanks again for the help.

Anton
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  #8  
Old 09-09-06, 04:48 PM
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Dimitris C. Milionis Dimitris C. Milionis is offline
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Anton this is great! [the second one] any more developments.
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